This too shall pass

So The past few days I have begun spotting and today it continues *though not how my normal period is I know its more than just spotting.  So I guess today will count as cycle day 1 yet again.  My endocrinologist wrote me a script to go get my progesterone levels checked one more time before we see the fertility specialist...so hopefully that will help eliminate how long it takes to get treatments and answers from them since its one of the tests I was told they ask for but since it's coming from her office insurance will cover part of it.   

My chart for this past month looked promising!

I have NEVER ovulated this early....and we had timed our intercourse correctly but low and behold my period came 4 days early.....still not giving enough time for Implantation. 

When I go to the specialist I'm bringing all my charts for the past year so she can see the progress and hopefully get us some answers quickly.  The entire thing is just so incredibly frustrating.  I do not know why I even got on here to vent.  I know that things will work out I know that God has a plan.  I want to make a difference in between, but I also wanted a miracle before our appointment.  I don't think I'm as devastated as I normally am when the red witch shows but maybe in part because i know we are already taking steps forward to get pregnant.  I'm just dreading the cost.  I'm dreading the cost, I'm dreading the wait.  Once we go see them it's like we are in there hands.  I know what I want and believe I know what I need: clomid and progesterone I just don't want to be stuck and prodded like a lab rat to get it. 

I know in the end everything always ends up working out...sometimes its just a little hard to get there.    All I want to do is cry and crawl back in bed and sleep.  I know I'll be ok this feeling will pass but I hope it passes sooner rather than later.