We are go for round 2

I went in this morning for my cycle day 2 blood draw and ultra sound to check and see if I would be able to start a new round of treatment right away.  Thankfully everything was a go.  I had no cysts and my estrogen was low enough for me to get treatment. 

So she is going to put me on a higher dose of Femara this cycle and then after Ovulation I will be doing a double dosage of the progesterone to try and hold off any spotting until my period is ready to come or I become pregnant. 

So after I got the call from the Dr's office saying that they were going to call in my prescription I went to pick it up on my way home from work after the Drs office was already closed.  Well I got home and looked at the bottle the pharmacy gave me and its Provera instead of Femara.  Same dosage and rules as the Femara but its the wrong medication.  So I called the pharmacist and they said they can't change it until they talk to the Dr because they Drs office had called it in and left a message on the voicemail but it was deleted after they listened so they can't recheck but its possible the person listening to the message mistook femara for provera since they sound so close.

So I called the nurses hotline to let them know the wrong medication was given to me and asked them to please call and specify what I actually need since they will not change it without a new script.

On another note I got this email from a friend today:
I wanted to write to tell you something that I understand may be upsetting. I'm pregnant. I wanted to tell before too long goes by, but also wanted to tell you before we're all together in a large group. I understand this can be frustrating and I don't mean to make your situation any harder on you. I will try my best to be sensitive to you and your situation. If you ever feel uncomfortable or frustrated around me, just tell me. 

I responded with: Aww(name) Thank you for including me.  I'm excited for you!  This struggle is hard but it's so amazing to see people I love get blessed in life and children are the most wonderful blessing of all.  And you deserve all the blessings since you two are wonderful Godly people who will raise those kids up to be amazing.  Never feel bad about rejoicing in front of me and please don't feel you have to walk on eggshells.  Ill be fine I promise.  I'm excited God's opened this door for you. 

I really feel this way.  I'm so excited she will be having a baby.  As much as I would love to be the one sharing the news knowing someone I love who is already such an amazing Mom and person and will do just as well with 2 is a blessing.  I may not be getting my bundle of joy yet and it may be years before God sees fit to allow me to experience the joys of pregnancy but it doesn't mean my current journey is any less important or meaningful.  I just have to find the meaning in life every day.

I can say people who know someone is struggling with infertility don't really know how to act around you.  They love you so they want to be sensitive but they aren't sure how far that goes.  They want to rejoice in their own happiness without disturbing yours.  It's so sweet of them but I feel like I can be stealing their joy just by being there sometimes.  So I want to show my support.  Just because I'm struggling doesn't mean I can't be happy for someone else.  Though some days I will be sad and cry I will move on after and grow from it. 

I just want to take advantage of every day and every opportunity as an opportunity to learn.  It's not going to be easy and sometimes I'm going to have to really look hard to try and find that silver lining.  But I'll find it.  With God's help.